The Watchmen – 3 hours I’ll never get back
By paul | April 5, 2009


I finally went to see The Watchmen tonight, and I have to say I’m sorry I did. I was very disappointed.
The film had some nice visuals, and it had a couple concepts that could have been really interesting to explore, but the story (if you can call it that) dragged on and on, and never really went anywhere. I was ready to leave about halfway though.
I did like the idea of the Dr. Manhattan character… becoming so disconnected from humanity when he’s altered in such an extreme way. I also liked the idea of what may happen to masked heros as they age, or what their personal lives might be like, but although the film touched on these story lines it just didn’t go far enough.
I was also a little confused by the fact that, with exception to Dr. Manhattan, none of these masked heroes appeared to be anything other than normal humans, yet they still exhibited super-human abilities… like punching though concrete walls and catching bullets with their bare hands. I also had no idea what caused Warshak’s mask to move, or what was up with that strange, horned, egyptian cat that just came out of nowhere (and why was no one surprised to see it)?
I’m giving The Watchmen 2 stars, and I should clarify my scale by saying I give one star simply for making a movie. The other star is for the few points in the film that I did like, but they weren’t enough to make this an enjoyable experience.
Save your money and wait for The Watchmen to come on TV… late at night when you don’t mind falling asleep while watching.

12 Comments
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Alec Peden on April 5, 2009 at 5:06 am.
I take it you never read the book?
paul on April 5, 2009 at 7:19 pm.
Alec, you are correct. Does the book make the movie make sense?
Ross Graham on April 6, 2009 at 8:43 am.
I never read the book. I was impressed with the visuals very much, having seen it in IMAX the first time with a friend who HAD read the book. I loved it 4/5 stars. He liked it 3/5 stars … said he missed the squid and the enormity of that impact. I really had no idea what he was talking about and thought he was trying to fool me.
All that said: It’s Rorschach … like the test. Much like the motions of his mask.
And after that: It’s a movie. I loved suspending belief for the entire thing and getting sucked into the world. There’s a big weird cat. Weird. Rorschach’s mask moves somehow. Weird. These guys can punch through walls and catch bullets. I wonder what the backstory is.
I think the point of the movie (maybe the book?) is that it digs into the world of the Watchmen after a lot of stuff has happened. We don’t see their creation stories. We’re not aware of their powers. We’re only aware that they are at the end of an era but needed again.
Loved it.
Second best comic/superhero movie.
Number one best was Unbreakable.
Samurai on October 24, 2009 at 1:07 am.
Watchmen is one of my favorites of this area ill explain why. I grew up on super hero fiction from batman Spiderman even mighty mouse. What makes watchmen so good is you notice every hero is a blue print from what we all know as the hero’s we grew up from such as the comedian which as super strength he could punch thru walls because he so big. Note the picture with him and the president he was portrayed to be big. I would say attributes not identical but simpler to the hulk or a juggernaut. The owl your not so snobby rich kid with lots of cool gadgets like Batman. Then you have Adrian the worlds smartest man who has simpler characteristic of superman being that he can use his entire brain with even in real life if capable would be known to give a person super strength. As human we don’t even use half the capacity of our brains noting the kind of phenomenon’s we can achieve with just a little adrenalin. Then you have warshak who has all the detective traits of batman but with a dark twist. I simply love this movie its symbolic to what the super hero life would be like if it existed in the real world. Sex guns murder and rape. The only super hero move out with a R rating. How can you give that 2 out of 5 stars?
4.5/5
Oh and the silk specter made into a mini porno comic!!!! LOL tell me you couldn’t see that happing to wonder women.
Jennifer on December 3, 2009 at 7:12 pm.
If you did not read the graphic novel, the movie is a required taste. The movie was 3 hours long, but SO much was left out. They did a good job at leaving in the major components of the story in, but the parts they left out do make the story confusing to The Watchmen virgins. I personally dont think they movie deserves 5/5, but is a very close 4.5/5! I think the reason most people disliked the movie so much was because they thought it would maybe be an action film. The Watchmen is not an action film, and if thats what you are looking for, you will be disappointed. If your looking for a deep, dark story line and don’t mind a few unanswered questions ((only unanswered if you have not read the story)), then The Watchmen is the film for you. I highly recommend reading the story to anyone who has either watched the movie, or is planning on watching.
"Ace" on April 16, 2010 at 10:38 am.
Though I will agree, you’d have to experience the literary works to fully understand the movie, a lot of what you’re not understanding is either common sense or you might have to seek for the answer in a more poetic or mental/emotional search.
As far as the animal, it’s common sense and some common knowledge. The company is called pyramid, Adrian has a fascination(sp) with pharohs and egyption control and what not, therefore the cat (which actually called a Lynx) is his pet because of his obsession with Egypt.
The rarschach design’s on his mask are based on perception. When asked during raroschach test “what do you see in this inkblot?” that is the last thought that Rarschach wants you to have and the last “thing” you see. He wants you to precieve him as “whatever you see” giving you free rien to do so.
It all started though when a woman ordereds a dress from the shop inwhich he worked with ink in it so it would move when she did….he got the fabric from that. There we go…
Pablo on June 3, 2010 at 7:07 pm.
It truly almost as bad as Battlefield Earth. THe rpoduction was high but the story was so muddled and laborius. The graphic novel blows it away and this crap of a movie verifies the author’s belief it could never be turned into a live action film. 2/10
Gotten on October 27, 2010 at 9:35 pm.
Do a little research and chill out. One of the superheroes used 100 percent of his brain, clearly cloning the lion thing from DNA or something. Dr. Manhattan made that material Rorschach had. The movie was great.
iSoniPrice on February 27, 2011 at 10:34 am.
omg dude, do you know what real life is? real life is where the heros are the hungry once and the people are always ignorant. That film is very realistic, except the super powers they have. Let me expain, first of all the film has to be weird, its just another movie full of satanic symbols (the one eye, pharaos)
The egyptian cat was created from all those doctors he killed, all of them together in one body, like a chimera, but with all their wisdom. (watch FMA Brotherhood) Rorshaks mask is probably just science. So before you write something like this, visit the real life and do a little research on the things that you think are stupid or weird in the film. Thats all theres to it.
Anyway the movie is great i watched it yesterday night, should have watched earlier, its a weird film but that makes it awesome. First when i heard Rorshak writing his journal it reminded me of Max Pain 2. But overall the film reminds me of the videogame Fallout 3, though i hate that game cuz its boring to me.
kevin on May 26, 2011 at 7:05 am.
Reading the book should be and always is irrelevant…that should never be a precursor or requirement to seeing a particular movie. The story needs to be able to stand on its own without any outside reference or a viewers prior knowledge of the story before hand. This movie did tend to ramble and seemed to have no direction at times but I am sure another viewing or two would remedy this although for a 3 hour plus movie to do this is inexcusable given the time to tell an actual story. To refer to Egyptian symbols as “satanic” is indicative of a juvenile mindset and is just stupid. Having said all this I did like the characters and the story did come to a logical ending and I will most likely watch it again. 3/5
Roger on March 21, 2012 at 11:45 am.
I normally don’t comment on such things but I loved the movie so much I have to stand up for its honor. This movie had deep symbolical suggestions. The few people I found in person that don’t like this movie seem to dense to grasp meaning from things, or just enjoy “visuals” from Michael Bay movies. Before watching it, I expected all the hero’s to have real powers. The fact that they were all like Batman made them seem more of a possibility then fiction. People in real life can punch through some thick materials with proper Martial Arts training, and maybe some modified gloves. The guy that caught the bullet, only did once and I considered him having real powers. He was “the worlds smartest man”, and he caught the bullet reading her facial expressions, premeditation and laws of momentum. As for your small mask issue, you can buy thermochromic paint that changes from the temperature of your breathe.
Bottom line is, if you think this was 2 stars, then I would love to hear what is better. I give this 5 stars easily, better than everything else that has come out the last 3 years. Stop having a pity party about 3 hours, I held in a 10 minute long piss because I didn’t want to miss anything.